Conflict In My Life-Being Scolded

For being the only daughter in the family really takes a lot of burden; high hopes and expectation from the family. But what the best thing being the only daughter is you'll get away with everything. Furthermore, if you want something, your parents will surely grand it. And that's my way of life. After the role of 'a-proud-children-in-the-family' was given to me (by idiotic brother who was originally should take that responsibility), my parents always hope the best from me, and i always give it. But to be the best, mom and dad already know which level i'm at so no pressure on that.

feel like a queen!

But recently, all the things i used to do seems so wrong in my parent's eyes. Nowadays i always get scolded for i did, for what i didn't do and for what about i'm going to do. Is it because i'm getting older. Well, to be honest, being the only daughter makes me very spoil. My parents always do stuff for me; the chores that usually a young women would do. I never lift a single finger, as if i'm a queen in the house. So maybe it is because of that my parents always stress me to do chores more often.

huwaaaaaa...!

So, i've tried changing myself by doing chores bit by bit. But still get scolded. What did i do wrong now? :( Be honest, how many of you out there like doing chores? This scolding thing make me stress being inside the house, i feel like running away. But, when come to think of it, wouldn't my parents will be sad when i'm gone. There'a a saying that i've read in facebook, 'when you're angry don't make a decision'. I know i'm a bit mad because of their scolding but i don't wanna hurt them. So i've decided to sulk! I've held a hunger protests to show my anger. (yeah i know it's a bit childish but that's all i could do for not getting them hurt). Today my parents went out, after they got out i quickly ate something. Now i'm waiting for they to come home and comfort me! :p

drawing to express my feeling!

I hate being scolded! >.<

Conflict In My Life: Dreaming

Dreams. Some says it's just a mind game, some says there are meaning behind it, and some says there are just what makes us human. But what i'm gonna share is not a big deal but it still bugs me.
Last night, i dreamt about him. A guy that i casted away from my life. I don't know if he knew the reason i did that but he keep haunting me in my dreams.
Well, the reason i did 'that' to him is just simply because i didn't want him and his relationship sink. Because of him and our friendship, i decided not to tell the 'truth' to avoid chaos. Just to be clear, i saved him from that chaos. But i got twisted and i was carrying all the blame. I'll make sure karma find its way to hit you back.



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Back to the dream, last night i dreamt twice baout him but in differ situation. One in where we met in the hospital. In that dream it started when i was riding a bike, and about to park it in the cycling area outside the hospital. Then i saw his bike, i've felt starange at first but decided to ignore the feeling. The reason why i'm at the hospital was to visit my grandad whose feeling sick and inneed of surgery. I wouldn't know he was at the same level; the same room with my grandad. He was with his family, and i was with mine.
The dream kept going to become more stranger when he suddenly he approached me with a lil kid in his arm; acting all friendly. Then he said softly, "I know you like lil kids". The kid was aroud four-years-old and so cute. I was shocked at first, and so did my family but i play cool and just smile and nodded. Then he went out with the kid. My mom stares at me. When i was about to go out and follow him. My mom asked who he was and why is he sick. After i explained everything to my mom, i went out to find him. But he was gone.

Then, the dream took me somewhere else. A second dream. In a car. With my mom and dad, and also him. The four of us was in the car, heading to this guy's home. It was weird but i never question it. Some how, the dream has made me read my parent's thought about the guy. They were feeling symphaty to him. If they're his parent to would feel so sad to see their children get sick at a young age.
Soon, we arrived at afront of his house. We all got out, and since he was sick, i thought that being nice for once wouldn't be bad, so i tried to help him get out from the car. I held out my hand for him to grab. But, he ignore it and went for my father's help instead. My jaws dropped. I couldn't believe it. It hurts my pride so much. I could feel the pain in the dream as if it was real.
Then we all got into the house. Me, mom and dad sat on the floor in the living room while that guy sat on the couch and his family was greeting and thanking us. Even though i was mad at him, even though i wasn't looking at him. But i could still feel him peircing stare at me. In my heart i was screaming "What the hell you want from me!!!". And that's the of the two dreams. I woke up, and say 'ASTAGHFIRULLAHULAZIM'. That's what a muslim would say when they've encounter something strange.
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But the most disturbing thing in the dream was i met him in a dream when he was sick. I met him in the dream but i never say a word to him. I met him in a dream and we have this unsettle feeling for each other. And i met him in the dream with his expression was sad and despair.
There's a fact when we dreamt about someone that means they miss us. Maybe he miss me, or he was to take revenge on me for what i've did.
It really hurt my pride to admit i miss him and i did wrong to him, and it really made me wish i take back what i had said to him before.



I wish i knew what's the hidden meaning to all this. Should i contact him again? Hmm... I dunno. :(
Dear Allah, please make this missing feeling go away, and make this missing feeling only towards you. :)

Egg-Tastic!

creative egg explosion begins now~ ENJOY!

"we're next! *gulp*"

rock-a-bye baby on the roof top~

"sir! there's been an accident!"

"i'll seek for your revenge my brother!"

the chick had got out from jail.
"im free!"

"Mother...Is that you?"
"You look tasty..."

"baby it's you and me~ <3"

"we're cute couple!"

this is the egg's home look like.

#eggs are tasty and good for you! hope you enjoy it! wink2~ ;D